Hitting My Stride at 45

As I celebrate my 45th birthday today it feels great to finally be certain that I am focusing on something I am extremely passionate about. It took me some time to get to this place but better late than never.

Shout out to the craft beer industry for having the "fire in the belly" (unless it is due to a late night craving for wings) and providing me with the spark to make a serious change to my career path. It's not just the great product you create everyday, but it is also about the passion, the "can-do" attitude, and the open-mindedness that exudes from the industry. Other industries and systems should aspire to mimic the craft beer model.

Cheers!

PS: Shout out to my lovely and patient wife for putting up with me and supporting my change.

One Thing to Acknowledge for More Happiness

Tap into Your Assumptions

There’s a lot of good advice out there about what to do for yourself in order to find or restore happiness. Most of the advice focuses on the “don’t do’s.” Don’t do this and you’ll be happier or don’t do that and happiness will return.  I believe most, if not all of these “don’t do’s” can usually be traced to one thought pattern.

WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?

It’s a thought pattern so strong that giving it any slight bit of focus sets you on a path of no turning back. Giving it focus turns into a mood. The mood then determines the actions you take. The actions you take then create the evidence you seek to turn that assumption into an entrenched belief.

- It’s the thought pattern that makes you think you need to hate that difficult teacher, coworker, or boss (judgment)

- It’s the thought pattern that tells you that you can’t do it (self defeat)

- It’s the thought pattern that creates a false sense of security through controlling others (insecurity)

- It’s the thought pattern that keeps you focused on what you think others may be thinking of you as opposed to just doing what makes you happy (insecurity)

- It’s the thought pattern that could be called the Excuse Generator 2000 (excuses)

- It’s the thought pattern that jumps into action once you hear a familiar label and automatically begin to think about and picture what that thing or person will look and behave like (labels, judgment)

- It’s the thought pattern that you use to mask your fears and deny yourself your shot at satisfying your wants or needs (facing fear)

- It’s the thought pattern that keeps you in the status quo (procrastination)

- It’s the thought pattern that leads to entrenched belief systems (limiting beliefs)

- It’s the thought pattern that keeps you thinking it’s someone else’s fault and they should fix it so your life can be better (blame)

It’s one thing we all do but wish we could give up. We make assumptions. We are very good at it.

In every instance of judging someone, assigning blame, labeling things or people, making excuses, avoid challenges, controlling others, hanging on to dear life of our belief systems, etc…you are exercising your well-developed ability to make assumptions.

NO TURNING BACK

Assumptions are so powerful because as humans we need to be right in our own minds. It feels great to tell yourself you are right. And it’s completely natural. Thus, as soon as the assumption enters your consciousness you are seeking proof that it is correct. An assumption leads to a perspective (mood) in which you only seek out information that you think supports your assumption. Even if it really doesn’t you’ll find a way to turn it in your favor. In actuality, you are working against yourself.

All you need is that “proof” in that one instance in order to turn that assumption into an entrenched belief system about a subject, a person, or yourself.

So what do you do to stop a thought pattern that comes so naturally to you?

5 STEPS TO STOPPING ASSUMPTIONS

STEP 1: Acknowledge it. Don’t dismiss it, just catch it in a net. Seriously, take a moment to write it down. Yes, you have the time. It takes much less time than the hours you will spend dwelling on an unacknowledged assumption.

You don’t want to abruptly dismiss an assumption. Assumptions are like the opinionated in-law that will get in your face if you try to turn away. You are likely not ever going to stop making assumptions so the key is to work with your natural talent.

You use assumptions to challenge perceived threats to yourself, why not use your ability to challenge to challenge the assumption itself?

But first you must appease it by understanding where it’s coming from. With practice it will go away.

STEP 2: Next, acknowledge the perspective (mood) that the assumption has created for you. What would you see in the mirror? Do you like looking like a grumpy troll? Pretty hopeless and negative in the grand scheme isn’t it? You know there is more than one side to every story or situation. Look for others and write them down.

STEP 3: Let one of the more positive perspectives (or at least neutral) into your mind.  When I do this I almost feel like I drift right into the new perspective. That’s because it literally frees my mind up from the negative energy and the accompanying stress. A new perspective will give you hope that the situation is not as dire as you though it was. All you need is a bit of hope that the situation can be improved upon for you to remain open-minded to solutions.

STEP 4: Make it memorable. Assign a catch word or image to your process of catching assumptions. The moment you think of the catch word or phrase, or call up the image, the steps to changing that assumption will come to you more easily.

STEP 5: Deploy your assumption net in other areas of your life.

Assumptions are absolute killers of positive feelings and maintaining some level of hope in a challenging situation. Acknowledge them to get on the path to more positive perspectives.

Better ‘tudes lead to better moods.

And if this fails to create more happiness, keep drinking craft beer responsibly :-).

Craft Beer as a Model for a More Fulfilling Life?

Hop bines reaching for the sky

Can the current state of the craft beer industry be a model for how to live your life more passionately and thus, create a more fulfilling life?

Some key things I address as a life skills coach are;
- finding and maintaining motivation to break the status quo
- discovering values and passions to create new opportunities
- avoiding judgment and limiting beliefs

First off, craft beer brewers seem to be a rather motivated lot of people. We have a group of people who realized that the industry, in its current state, was not good enough. They stepped forward and took huge risks to implement change. It takes serious motivation to create a movement within an industry dominated by massive, "give-me-profits-or-give-me-death" entities. From a life skills perspective, motivation is best sustained through doing something that you are intrinsically passionate about. Craft beer brewers and others in the industry seem quite intrinsically motivated about what they do. If you try to follow industry developments and what beers were just brought to market, you know there is no status quo in this industry. The energy level of the industry is through the roof!

I think we can all agree that the craft beer industry is exploding through innovative ideas and increasing market demand. Each new off-shoot in service or beer style is backed by someone or some group that is putting values and passions into action in order to create opportunities for themselves. The number one thing you can do to feel good about the work you do, and to do it well, is to do something you are passionate about. Without passion you will be hard-pressed to make it through the rough patches.

Life Skills Lesson- The #1 thing I have learned in my life skills coaching training is to avoid judgment at all costs. It has been mind-blowing how destructive and self limiting making assumptions (judgmental thinking) can be. As humans we like to be right. Once we make an assumption about an idea or a person we automatically get into the mood that will create the evidence we need...to the point that we will manufacture evidence if that is what it takes. Assumptions keep us in our comfort zone. If you only do one thing to improve your quality of life, start challenging the assumptions you make about yourself, ideas, and other people.

The craft beer industry does not seem to have a self-esteem problem. I am sure there are still a fair amount of detractors out there who think that craft beer could never reach the stature of wine when pairing a drink with food. This has not stopped the craft beer industry. Craft beer does not care what others think of it. Stop caring about what you think others are thinking about you.

In all of the festivals, home brew meetings, pubs and bars I have attended I can't recall ever seeing craft beer people passing judgment upon one another. We get together and we celebrate and congratulate each person's contribution. It is the most congenial and collaborative interaction I have ever seen. So many people willing to share recipes, brews, and ideas for the greater good of the craft. Maybe this would work in other industries to get them to innovate and turn out a consistent quality product, or maybe it wouldn't, but the craft beer industry is one innovative, dynamic, and forward-thinking force to be reckoned with.

So the craft beer industry is ripe with motivation and passion, and wastes little time and energy passing judgment on itself or the ideas people bring to the craft. If you instill motivation and passion, while limiting judgmental thinking, you will gain a much more fulfilling life. Look to the craft beer industry for inspiration to create a much more fulfilling life for yourself.